Wipe Away tears (Daily bread Jan. 30th entry)

God will wipe away every tear from their eyes . . . . There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away. —Revelation 21:4

I had just finished preaching on the heartaches of life, when a couple approached me at the front of the church. The woman told me about the burden they bore as a family. Their young son had severe physical problems, and the strain of the constant care of this needy little guy, coupled with the heartache of knowing they couldn’t improve his situation, sometimes felt unbearable.

As the couple shared, with tears in their eyes, their little daughter stood with them—listening and watching. Seeing the obvious hurt etched by tears on her mother’s face, the girl reached up and gently wiped the tears from her mother’s cheek. It was a simple gesture of love and compassion, and a profound display of concern from one so young.

Our tears often blur our sight and prevent us from seeing clearly. In those moments, it can be an encouragement to have a friend who cares enough to love us in our pain and walk with us in our struggles.

Even though friends can be a help, only Christ can reach beyond our tears and touch the deep hurts of our hearts. His comfort can carry us through the struggles of our lives until that day when God Himself wipes away every tear from our eyes (Rev. 21:4).

The God who washed away our sins will also wipe away our tears.

Working Life

Today was a ok day at work despite the fact that i was deployed to another station. In fact nowadays work is just so-so... after a while its just repitition... thats why i was determined to make a change in my life this year... I would either apply for a degree or apply for transfer, in the end i got the degree course so i guess i will be staying in the ward for the time being. but i guess maybe i wun want to stay here for long also, but only time will tell.

I cant believe it that i have worked 1 and a half years... I still feel inadequate in certain ways... My ward is a nice place to be in. I really grew , matured , blossomed (not sure that is a correct word to use)... However it can be a hell hole sometimes. But i guess thats what work is all about. It aint exactly a bed of roses...

Today was sitting at the bus stop waiting for my bus, was listening to the 200 pounds beauty song... then was just thinking to myself that i actually feel this emptiness in myself sometimes when i actually quieten myself down. I really would love to cry out to someone. But more than that i want renewed hope in my daily life... cause i really have been using my own strength to get thru day by day... (or more or less to say i have back slided away from god)... I really feel tired and empty sometimes... i feel ashamed to approach my cell group member to pray for me cause i have been MIA for so long... they have probably forgotten about me ba...

I have never been a strong christian... But i know that ppl need some pillar of support for their strength. And this pillar is something that cannot be found on this earth...Only then can we be pillars for other ppl.

OFF TODAY

Today is my off day... Didn't do much today... As I slept very late last night I woke up around 12 today... anyways was still very very exhausted when i woke up... But i had piano lesson today so had to practise a bit before going for piano class. I hope i can continue my piano practising once my sim course starts, cause nowadays even without studying i really have to squeeze time to practice. Its also due to the fact that i am not very disciplined in practice. hehe...

Anyways after todays off i will be working for 6 days shift straight and my schedule is all packed... sianz... will have to go pass up my documents to sim after work on friday and settle my bills.

Today had afternoon shift... Have not been working day shifts for quite some time after my AL and night shifts... I just felt rather disorientated ... Had chemo to put up, new changes to follow etc... Anyways i couldn't finish on time and had to go home at around 10.30... (it was also due to the fact that I had someone as my junior... ahem...). After work I met up qith shirley at the mac at tampines interchange and we chatted until 3.30 in the morning. She has night shift tomorrow while I am off...

When i think about the fact that I joined nursing, I realise it was a heavy decision to make right after school... Though I enjoy what I do with all my heart, i cannot deny the fact that it has eaten into my personal life. Sometimes I feel upset, but since I have chosen this path for myself I will still have to go on with it... I only wish for a more enriching experience.

I managed to get into SIM which came as a surprise cause i sort of thought i would not get selected... but i did... so i think its by god's grace that i got selected.... And i will take it as a challenge .

Just came back from having supper and chatting with Kavi and verna. Up to date they are the ppl I can feel totally at ease with... We sort of grew up together and been thru lots. Our friendship is priceless. I thank God for bringing such friends to my life to make life more bearable... haha.

We were talking about our memories in secondary school and how much we missed school compared to working life... Things were so much simpler than. I used to really like someone in secondary school . Then they were asking me why i liked him... Actually its sometimes things like these that we have no idea how to answer... its just a simple moment that sort of clicks or touches our heart that causes a lasting impression. Suddenly ur heart will feel alive and sweet. Although i guess i got rejected but my heart still felt alive at that time... Then it suddenly struck me that now i go on to my day to day life looking contented, but my heart feels really dead. I think i have been creating a barrier around my heart. I guess its fear of rejection and alot of things happened around that made me beleive there is no love that actually lasts, or if there is one, it probabaly wun be mine... i guess i sound pessimistic in this aspect (its a part of me that i never really show). But even if my heart is never made alive I promise myself i will still be strong and happy.

Talking about my heart I have a heart appointment this saturday at heart centre cause of my frequent fainting spells. Haha...

Haiz... sianz... Night shift sucks

Haiz... i have been called back to do night shift today although i am suppose on annual leave now... Anyways I will make sure they give it back to me by hook or by crook. I just hate doing night shifts... Hopefully tonight will be peaceful. I know some of my collagues like night shift but i find it a hindrance to my daily life.. I cant plan my stuff properly. I was just in the midst of clearing my cupboard when my sister called me back... Actually i could have rejected them but i know that somebody has to take over it... Cause ppl have taken over me... thats a part of what nursing is all about. Just feel like grumbling though i know its no use at all.. On top of thAT I have a runny nose and diarrhea... And I have my facial appointment at 1 pm tomorrow... My face already sucks as it is.. On top of that u wanna add a night shift before hand... I think i will really die of fatigue tomorrow... Plus I have night shift again on wednesday... Arrgh... i hate it. I hate it...

Last night was looking through my clothes and sorting out those i will never wear again and those that are not suitable for wearing. Found out that my dress sense has really changed.. Not a very drastic change but at least i feel better about how i look. I think i have to owe it to some of my colleagues cause always accompant them go shopping until i sometimes become a mini shopping queen myself... last night when i was sorting through my clothes i suddenly had difficulty in breathing , cold sweat and suddenly turned pale.. i jjust felt very uncomfortable... I suspect it has has something to do with my cat fur cause my cat always used to hide inside my cupboard... I just felt very uncomfortaBL like near fainting but off course not as serious as that...

Think i will just continue with my spring cleaning after this...

FEEL SICK

This is the worst diarrhea I have ebver had.... went to the toilet 7 or 8 times.. Well. i guess its good in the sense can lose weight, but feel damn uncomfortaBLE. Today spent my day slacking at home. My brother helped me find out wat is wrong with my computer... My computer screen keeps on flickering.. Inthe end there is something wrongs with my graphics card so went across the road to buy a new one for 79 bucks and install it. Now just need to download the sound card cd rom.. cant seem to find it anywhere in the house... Later will just ask my brother... No mood or energy to go out either . just feel so lethargic and weak. I think i will just spend my evening packing my room ready for cny ba...

MiLDLY Sick

Now feeling quite sick... tummy ache plus diarrhea. think must be last night I either overate or ate the wrong thing... Anyways I will not let that affect my plans tonight . Me and angelina are going to have to sleep over at my sister's house. hehe...

Beginning of a new blog

Hello. It has been approximately more than a year since I last blogged... Dunno why, been busy with work. Besides work mostly try to keep myself busy with piano classes, going out with colleagues or friends or just staying at home to rest. Can't believe I have worked for 1 and a half years already. i just remember the days when i was still anewbie ever ready to start work. I only thank god that I have not lost that fire and passion for what i do...



Today went out with my poly mates to eat seoul garden. Didn't really want to eat there cause i feel like I have been putting on weight recently. Wll in the end i gave in... hehe... and just ate the seoul garden. Though it has been 6 hours but i feel like its not yet digested yet and still feel kinda sick and full... haha During the conversations with my poly mates one of them asked me why i never updated my blog. I told them that i had totally neglected it. But then i decided it would be nice to have a blog to write my thoughts too... I am not writing anything secretive but just my general thoughts... i remember last time during poly I used to have a blog... really felt happy to write in it...



Anyways I applied for a part time degree in sim for nursing... i might not get in but i just wanna give it a shot... I am really hoping i get in....